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Hello! And Welcome!

Before we get into all the knee slappers, the giggles and fun, id like to add some background on why I decided to create this site.
You see when I was a kid my father would take me to see my grandparents. As soon as we entered the house my dad was ready with a joke, and my grandfather would return with another one on the spot. These are some of my fondest memmorys with him. so in his memmory I give you...

jokepalooza

thank you, and enjoy.

My personal favorite

"Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?" "In case they get a hole in one!"
"What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common?" "They're both Paris sites."
"What did one wall say to the other?" "I'll meet you at the corner."
"What did Baby Corn say to Mama Corn?" "Where's Pop Corn?"
"What does a sprinter eat before a race?" "Nothing, they fast!"
"I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out. The cashier said never mind."
"Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack each other up."
"What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?" "A pouch potato!"
"What does garlic do when it gets hot?" "It takes its cloves off."
"What happens when M&M’s can’t agree on anything?" "They reach an M-passe."
"The other day I learned how to make an eggroll" "You push it"
What did the cereal bring to the bank? Chex.
How do you make seven even? Take away the s.
I have a joke about construction, but I’m still working on it.
I brought an egg to a comedy show and he cracked up.
It takes a lot of guts to be an organ donor.
A joke becomes a dad joke once it is apparent.
Everyone’s sharing the rumor about butter, but I’m not about to spread it.
I told a joke about chemistry, but it didn’t get a reaction.
I’m a big dreamer, so I always hit the snooze button.
I’m following the seafood diet. I see food, then I eat it.
What do you call someone who doesn’t have a nose or body? Nobody knows.
Whats a plumbers favourite holiday? Sink-o de mayo.

The Holiday special!

In the spirit of the holidays I thought I'd add this little number in here.

What is the best possible holiday present? A broken drum—you just can’t beat it!
Why did the scarecrow get a big Christmas bonus? Because he was outstanding in his field.
Where do Santa and his elves go to vote? The North Poll.
How does the snow globe feel this year? A little shaken.
What do Santa’s little helpers learn at school? The elf-abet!
Why do reindeer like Beyoncé so much? She sleighs.
What do you call a broke Santa Claus? Saint Nickel-less.
What do snowmen take when the sun gets too hot? A chill pill.
What did the naughty soccer announcer get from Santa Claus? COOOOOOOAAAALLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!
What is the best possible holiday present? A broken drum—you just can’t beat it!
What did one snowman say to the other? “Is it just me, or do you smell carrots?”
Why didn’t Rudolph get a good report card? Because he went down in History!
What is Santa’s favorite kind of candy? Jolly Ranchers.
What was Santa’s favorite subject in school? Chemis-tree!
What do you call an obnoxious reindeer? Rude-olph
What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.
What do you call Kris Kringle when he goes on his wife’s health insurance? A dependent Claus.

What's a New Year's resolution? Something that goes in one year and out the other.
Why should you have your left foot in the air on New Year's? To make sure you start the new year on the right one!
Why should you never make fireworks angry on New Year's? You might just set them off!
What's the one type of pain that's enjoyable on New Year's? Cham-pain!
I hate it when they drop the ball in Times Square. It reminds me of what I did all year!
What does every New Year have in store for us? Another 365 days!
What do New Year's parades and Santa have in common? No one is ever awake to see them.
Why didn't the snowman go to the party on New Year's Eve? He wanted to chill out.
What did the little champagne bottle call his father? Pop!
What’s a cow’s favorite holiday? Moo Year’s Eve.
Where can you find comedians on New Year’s Eve? Waiting for the punch line.
What did the ghost say on Jan. 1? Happy Boo Year!
Why should you put your new calendar in the freezer? To start off the New Year in a cool way.
What happened to the man who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve? He got 12 months!
My resolution was to read more, so I turned on the subtitles on my TV.
I'm goping to order a pizza 5 minutes before new year and when they arrive I'll say I ordered this a year ago!

Puns, Puns, And More Puns!!

I only seem to get sick on weekdays. I must have a weekend immune system.
Of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the most remarkable.
My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.
If I ever find the doctor who screwed up my limb replacement surgery…I’ll kill him with my bear hands.
It's easy to convince ladies not to eat Tide Pods, but harder to deter gents.
I asked my date to meet me at the gym but she never showed up. I guess the two of us aren't going to work out.
I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today. It was clogged.
This food around here is fit for a king. King , come here, boy!
Knock-Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo who? There's no need to cry about it
Finding ugly shoes is quite a feat.
What's a snappy title for a review on Edward Scissorhands?
Let's make like your nose and run!
Are We Having "PUN" Yet?
What did the mathematician do when he was constipated? He Worked it out with a pencil
I went fishing with my friends Rod and Annette
I have a few jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work
"I have a split personality," said Tom, being frank.
I Renamed my iPod The Titanic, so when I plug it in, it says “The Titanic is syncing.”
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it

DIRTY JOKES 😜

Adult use only!

What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me.
Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals.
I'll admit it, I have a tremendous sex drive. My girlfriend lives 40 miles away.
Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.
Let's play carpenter! First, we'll get hammered, then I'll nail you.
What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public? A private tutor.
My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.
Dear NASA: Your mom thought I was big enough. —Pluto
What are the three shortest words in the English language? "Is it in?"
I once dated a HTML student that liked foreplay. She always put head first.

Now i have to use some of these references so below are some links to some dad jooke websites that i used.